McDonald’s narrowboat plan could bypass Stafford planners to reach Stone

A floating McDonald’s could be the latest attempt to bring the fast food giant to Stone, with plans said to be looking at a seasonal narrowboat operation on the Trent and Mersey Canal.

The preliminary proposal, shared with ALBOS, suggests a branded narrowboat takeaway could trade in Stone from April until October, serving food daily from 7am to 11pm.

Rather than taking on the usual challenge of finding a permanent site and getting it through Stafford based planners, the idea would see the business arrive by water instead.

Mooring spots said to be under consideration

According to the plans, three possible mooring points are being looked around the Star Lock.

One would place the boat below the lock, alongside M&S.

The other two would be above Star Lock, either on the Crown Street car park side or on the Crown Meadow side, close to the Peace Pole.

The Crown Meadow option is said to be the early favourite. That is largely because the nearby amphitheatre could be used as an informal outdoor seating area during the warmer months, giving customers somewhere to sit with their food while watching the world go by.

The application is said to describe the space as an “existing stepped customer dining solution”.

Summer trial aimed at visitors and passing boats

Under the proposal, the narrowboat would run as a summer trial from April to October, aiming to catch both local trade and passing canal traffic.

The idea would be to serve breakfast from 7am, with the boat then continuing through lunch, afternoon, and evening trade until 11pm.

That would allow it to pick up early canal tow path users, lunchtime visitors, after school custom, as well as boaters arriving into Stone looking for somewhere quick to eat.

There is also said to be a reduced menu designed specifically for narrowboat operations, with some items adapted for galley cooking and quick towpath collection.

No details have emerged on whether that includes a lock side meal deal, though the absence of a drive through lane is believed to be one of the scheme’s few drawbacks.

Litter concerns addressed in unusual way

One of the obvious questions is litter, particularly with the canal running right through the heart of town.

The application papers attempt to deal with that head on.

They reportedly state that concerns about waste entering the canal would be managed through the deployment of “autonomous humanoid environmental response units” patrolling 150 metres either side of the mooring location.

In slightly plainer language, that means litter picking robots.

The documents go on to claim the robots would be able to identify branded packaging, collect dropped waste, separate recyclables, and monitor towpath cleanliness in real time, helping protect both the canal corridor and the wider public areas.

There is, sadly, no word on whether they would also be expected to clear abandoned shopping trolleys, rogue traffic cones, or other random items found in the canal.

Stone reaction would likely be mixed

As with any McDonald’s story in Stone, opinion would probably split pretty quickly.

Some would welcome the convenience, especially if it meant a breakfast stop by the canal or an easy meal on the way home.

Others might feel that a floating takeaway next to Star Lock is not quite what the canal conservation movement had in mind.

A few early views shared with ALBOS suggest people are already taking sides.

Patty O’Furniture, from Stone, said,

“I’m all for it. We’ve got boats, we’ve got people, we’ve got fries, it just makes sense.

If I can sit in the amphitheatre with a burger in the sunshine, that sounds like a decent afternoon to me.”

Neil Down, near Crown Street, was less convinced.

“The towpath is busy enough as it is without people queueing for fries next to the lock,” he said.

“One wrong step and your Filet O Fish really would be locally sourced.”

Ella Vator, from Stone town centre, said the idea at least suited the place.

“Everyone keeps saying Stone needs something different, well this is definitely different,” she said.

“Better than another empty unit and at least a narrowboat suits the town.”

Others were more wary about the practical side.

Moe Ring, who lives close to the canal, said,

“Who exactly is clearing up when half a McNugget meal blows into the cut in a strong breeze? Unless those litter robots are real, I think this one can stay firmly tied up in the imagination.”

And Chris P. Bacon, from Aston Lodge, seemed mostly happy to enjoy the chaos.

“Imagine telling people from out of town that Stone’s McDonald’s is on a narrowboat by Star Lock and you can eat it in the amphitheatre,” he said.

“It’s completely ridiculous, which is probably why I like it.”

The proposal documents also claim the franchise operator is keen to get local residents involved in naming the boat.

While it would trade under McDonald’s branding, the craft would still need an official registered name for Canal and River Trust purposes.

Among the names said to be under consideration are The Golden Barge, Usain Boat, and, inevitably, The McFloat.

That part, at least, may prove even more divisive than the menu.

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